I am leaving Sarawak today. It has been a very eventful week for me, in terms of leisure and writing. I got to spend time with my wife and her family, went to Brunei for the first time to have Italian food (LOL), and probably had the best writing streak in months. Last week, I wrote about the benefits of moving around and the impact it has on my productivity. This week, I want to document the end of my experience here and reflect on how it has helped me reinvigorate my love for writing. I hope that some of my experiences here could help you (the reader) to decide on what you want to do with your working and personal life. Without further ado, let’s get to it!

#1: I wrote 5 articles in one week – the best writing productivity I had – and was happy doing it

Everything just flowed. That’s how I felt when I was writing for the whole week. I left Kuala Lumpur on a Saturday afternoon, tired and burned out from working a corporate job and dealing with a lot of corporate b*shi*ery. I had plans to write some articles but didn’t really have much high hopes for it. The flight to Sarawak was typical but for some reason, I was very awake and refreshed. I had downloaded Moneyball to watch but after about 45 minutes watching it, I had the urge to whip out my notepad and write.

I didn’t exactly write articles but poems. For some reason, the pen flowed effortlessly as I wrote on and on for about 30 minutes, penning down at least a dozen poems and haikus. I felt like a new man, and proceeded to brainstorm what articles I should write for the week. The ideas came easy. There’s just something about removing yourself from a stressful environment and you see the change happen to yourself rapidly.

After landing, my mind was overflowing with an urge to write. I started writing down the titles and key points in WordPress and the next morning, something akin to the “deep flow” state that Tim Denning talked about happened. My fingers couldn’t keep up with all the words, sentences, numbers and flows that were coming out of my mind. In 2 hours, I basically finished a 1,300-word article and went out for breakfast for some Kolok mee.

For the first time in a long time, I was actually quite satisfied with what I wrote and wanted to write more. I didn’t feel the background stress like the ones I felt in Kuala Lumpur, and none of my work worries were on my mind. There’s just a calm and serenity that I got away from the bustling city. Safe to say, in the next 3 days, I wrote a total of 4 articles and I even had fun doing it.

#2: I Had the Best Quality Time with my Wife, and Reflected A Lot

We go for breakfast every morning. Somedays, Kolok Mee. Somedays, Laksa. Somedays, Gueh Chap. Somedays, Wantan Mee. A nice cup of kopitiam coffee and I feel like the day is for me to conquer. Compared that to my time working in KL, everyday felt like a slog. Waking up at 6.30am was such a pain to go through another 1.5 hours of getting to work. Breakfast is consumed in an ungodly manner, or rather devoured in the interest of time.

There was a just a big background stress at the back of my mind constantly, and my sleep was affected. I wake up close to 3 or 4 times throughout the night. Guess how many times I woke up in Sarawak? Zero. Sleep was just so blissful here. I truly appreciated the peace and quiet after so many years of rushing and hustling in the big city. Being here made me realise that climbing the corporate ladder was more akin to climbing the ladder to death by overwork. My mental and physical health were being affected and some days I wondered in Sarawak, what if I just drop dead one day working like a dog?

This gave me an entirely new perspective on life. My dad worked very hard to support us to the point that he sacrificed his health. While he did it for the sake of his family, I feel fearful now that by the time I hit 45 years old, I might just end up in the hospital. I never want to worry my wife, family and friends like that. All the time I was here in Sarawak, my wife and I were happy. We went to the beach to work, facing the gentle sea breeze, drank some coconut, and saw the simple lives of people living in rural areas. It was nice, but I know if I don’t take that leap to quit and work on my business, nothing will change and the time I am spending with my wife like this will be limited.

#3: Going on my own is scary, but having regrets is even worse

I reflected on many things during my week here. I am still working a full-time job in corporate and I love my colleagues I am working with. However, the rat race and the kind of corporate environment I work in are becoming more unbearable to my own mental health that it is already causing physical symptoms. Many thoughts came to my mind about this, to endure it but I have already did it for so many years and it became clearer everyday that this is not for me.

I have always been fearful of going on my own and establishing my own business. There’s just so many uncertainties where I could be facing financial difficulties and failing. However, I do feel that continuing on my current path will lead to ruin, both mentally and physically. After 7 years of doing so, I feel like I have given my all. I have grown and persevered but at the end of the day, I am still working under someone else and dealing with unreasonable bosses’ and management’s bul*shi*ery. I have decided that if I were to fail or succeed, I will do it on my own terms. Not someone else’s.

There’s a high chance of failure. I know that. But better to be on the boat I built on my own, rather than another ship that someone else is steering. Cliché line but it’s true.

Conclusion

My one week here in Sarawak solidified my will and motivation to go take the leap to build my own business. At this juncture of my life, I can no longer just sit back in a corporate job, and subject myself to the whims of bosses and management and risk myself being in a hospital down the line. I am not saying that building my own business will not be stressful, but at least it’s on my own terms.